Sunday, June 8, 2008

Driving Myself Nuts

I don't think I ever want to sell a house again.  This sucks.  I spent 3/4 of my round of golf staring at the phone begging it to ring with an offer.  I think I'll feel a wonderful sense of relief when this process is over.  No, I guarantee it.  

The people back for a second look yesterday still have it among their top picks, and now want to get a feel for the neighborhood at different times of day.  Clearly, they're not the impulse shoppers that I was.  

Anyhow, the golf yesterday was almost comical.  5 over after 5 holes with 4 three putts.  Then played the next four holes even, including a two putt birdie on a par 5 for 41.  Then, a small wait and a lot of staring at the phone as the tenth tee was jammed up.  

I proceed to double 10, triple 11, double 12, and then maybe double 13 and bogey 14, I think.  Either way, something like 10 over after 14.  Hit the par 5 15th in two and make eagle.  Bogey 16, Par 17 and 18 for 45.  Smooth 86.

I was playing with my buddy Robert in a twosome, and there were two ahead of us, including one gentleman he knew, so at 7 when it got really slow we joined up with them, the other being a first time golfer.

Now, I don't mind at all playing with people of any skill level, but watching a shitty golfer try to teach a total beginner how to play....the unintentional comedy scale heads through the roof.  For starters, the four minute lesson on the flop shot (giving a 4-yr-old a ten speed instead of a tricycle) was great, considering the beginner was at the front of the green, and had 3/4 of the green back to the pin that he could use to roll the ball up.  Or the pitch shot that he kept preaching how hard you have to swing through the rough to be able to hit the ball.  

I also liked the tee ball where he corrected the stance on his buddy's driver, and squared his buddy up (even though he aims 40 yd right of his target himslef and comes way over the ball to bring it back left), but leaves the ball sitting 3/4 of the way back in his buddy's stance, even though you typically set up with the driver just inside your front foot.

Anyway, I just kept telling myself to try not to be infected by anything he was saying.  When we hit the 11th hole, and it was still slow, they backed off and went back to play 10 again and decided to hang back since the first timer was supposed to be getting a lesson.  

Bobby turns to me and says, "Don't say anything."  So I paused, tried not to for a minute, but I just can't let it go....."Lesson one, get a new instructor." 

Pretty lazy night after that.  Ate some crab legs and watch the Belmont at Full Moon Oyster Bar after that.  Kind of a disappointing and boring race after all the hype.

Then just picked up a movie and fell asleep pretty early.

Probably just hanging around the house today.  I probably need to think about starting to pack up the stuff that I don't really use daily.

Be well.

1 comment:

bonefish78 said...

You asked for it. GOLF!!!